Motherhood for me has been my saving grace. I was, quite simply, a mess. But the moment I ushered in that new life all my focus, attention, and energy finally had an outlet. Of course I didn't have a clue about what I was doing, but the journey was enjoyable and learning was the fun part. Just when I was familiar with and completely enamored with my first child we were pregnant again. I'll never forget asking myself, "how on earth will I have enough love for another human? Will I love them just as much as the first?" And then the day comes and never again are those thoughts pondered or those words spoken. Each and every little life just as awesome as the the one before. I could not understand how I was honored with such a gift. To raise these sweet babies into functioning, loving, God honoring individuals. To mold and form their hearts and minds is such a weighty task. Who am I to mess that up? To not take the task seriously? To not allow it to be priority number one from the day they entered this world . In me was the responsibility to set the foundations, place the boundaries, mold their character, and then set them free. God, what task have you set before me? Will I look back on my life and see that all of the heartache, all of the worry, the prayers, the long talks before bed, the tears poured out in the quiet of my bedroom, all of the laughter and silly games played, sponge bob and veggies tales videos watched till were blue in the face, play dough smeared into the carpet, puzzles made and video games played for hours on end, bicycle rides and water park slides, late night school projects being finished, cups of coffee and hot chocolate fulled conversations, chicken nugget fast food trips, summer camp drop offs, Sunday morning worship and intimate talks about the love of God poured out for them will all be worth it? Can the love of a parent even be contained or rightly expressed? Am I coming close to touching the tip of the ice burg of expressing it accurately? Will I take each and every day and moment to add to their life in a positive way? Will they look back and see my heart poured out for them? Will they know all I want it to see them prosper in this life? To live! To fulfill their God given desires and destiny. To experience all that life has to offer and not take one day for granted. What a monumental feat set before us as parents. What a stark reminder that God feels exactly the same way towards us as we do towards our children. If we love this much , then how much more does He love us?